I may have been really sick over the weekend, but I must have been fighting it for a few weeks. Now that I am getting better, I have so much more energy that is all I can think of.

Okay, so get this. Yesterday the SG sends me this email:

My cellular phone broke and I do not have a phone. The only way to get a hold of me is with e-mail. Right now I cannot afford a new cellular phone and since I have the work phone I really do not need anymore.


To make a long story short, he dropped his phone in his coffee cup, and since his mother can use email now and his contract w/ his cell provider is almost up, he doesnt need to have a personal cell phone anymore.

So in true Lola fashion, I overanalyze this scenario. I figure he is trying to blow me off and is making up a bs lie....except that I told him last week that there was really no need for us to talk anymore, that it was kind of weird, and if he didn't want to talk to me I was fine with that.

So I figured he was just being courteous.

Okay that's fine. Ummm but why all of a sudden? I mean, for most of the past oh two and a half years he has been pretty much ignoring me, to the point where I rarely try to call, only contacting through email or text, and for the most part only when I have to...i.e. business or something like that. Sure we have had a few conversations, but other than that, not really.

I wish there was a confusion smily...

Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..