Yep, I feel dragged out...especially turning 50 this week....gag!!!!
About H: I am not sure. He still has little to no contact so basically he is not in my life and I can forget him but I still miss him and our marriage. The hardest part is missing "family". Basically, it is all gone (recap - between 2006 and 2009 had 3 major deaths and my husband and daughter left me). My daughter told me yesterday when I told her that I missed seeing her (she can see me but is "too busy") that she had to go find her own family. That hurts so I guess I am still dealing with the downfall of what has happened.
I know that if I came to the board now and read someone saying that 4 years later they are still hurting, I would be devastated. My life is ok and, in some ways, I really do enjoy being alone. I have some wonderful people in my life who I came to know because of this and I would hate them to not be in my life. I have done a lot of fun traveling and activities from pole dancing, to belly dancing to pottery. It isn't a bad life but there is a piece that is gone and like a circle with a piece out of it, I don't roll like I use too.
Sitting quietly doing nothing, the flowers bloom effortlessly.
bomb: Jan 25, 2006 not seen since DD moved in with H - 9/1/08 H filed for divorce - 11/2008 Divorce dismissed by courts - 4/2010 still nothing
