Had a bit of a blow up this weekend. I started pressing W about when she is going to move out and what her plan is. We got into a bit of an argument about how it is unfair for her to 'float' between houses as she sees fit to do whatever over there and go back and forth, etc. I said a couple of choice things that I shouldn't. I asked her if she was taking Xanax (she denied) and S18 overheard.
I sometimes 'fall off' the detachment wagon and thoughts about her and OM get to me at times and that is what drove the conversation (I don't like seeing her around thinking that she is hooking up with OM over at the other place as she sees fit).
She said she is going to start staying there on weekends and having the kids there every other weekend with her until school is out.
She talked to S11 and S12 and they had a lot of questions. I was there for part of it. I corrected her when she said "WE think this is the best thing to do". I told them that "I didn't want our family to have to split up" - not in an argumentative way but she flipped.
We had to step out of the room but I told her to use the word "I" and not "WE" when discussing the motivation about separating. I thought we were clear on this point, but she keeps trying to pull me into the decision based upon something I said about the 'game being over because I have tried everything' and tried to use that to say that I am agreeing to all this and that it is mutual.
On the one hand she is adamant with me about how SHE HAS DECIDED TO MOVE OUT but then when the audience changes to our kids it is WE. She hasn't fooled the teenagers and they seem pretty irritated with her right now. My only words to them were that I was hoping their mother would make a different choice and that we have been having lots of problems and needed to work on things.
This is probably one of the most challenging situations - she is only halfway moved out so I have to see her around the house. I need to get back to my 'don't care' attitude, which I think was working well for me until I got into this conversation with her.
Last edited by tryingtilDorR; 05/03/1005:45 PM.
ME/XW:47 S21, D19, S15, S14 M:21 T:26 W moved 6/10 I filed 7/10 D final 4/12 remarried 8/12 W wants to R 12/10 and 4/11 but I decline
