DaddyLS, I wish you were right! Sorry BD to t/j but I am pretty sure that is how I have been acting toward my WH! And yet it hasn't caused him to choose me over the OW!
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The act he is doing is based off of selfishness, and it cannot last. When you break a house up there is going to be pain in it for him, that he doesn't realize. It won't hit him till later. It hurts like hell, and it NEVER goes away.
I guess in my sitch, the above hasn't happened to my WH yet and it will take divorce for him to get it.
I guess for Babydoll, since the divorce hasn't started rolling yet, she can still take the steps you suggest. I kind of see it as the last resort versus the no contact last resort that is described in DB. But how will her H recognize the pain he has caused before his daughter is born?
Here goes the deal. He caused pain in others. But the pain he caused to himself won't even hit him until after he's divorced.
Unless his wife was abusive or neglectful of him over a long period of time, he's telling a lie. That lie is going to hurt him.
He'd have to be really one of those types who cares about no one but themself to get past this pain he's going to face.
I felt that a peer who made the error could communicate it to him. He's got no ties to the new situation except the other woman. With his "home" he has his wife, kids and a kid not yet born.
He's going to hurt big leaving "home". You as a wife ARE HOME, you are everything he needs.
Also on you women. These guys have to understand that they can get anything they need from "home". And its completely safe. They made a common mistake, and they need to bring their asses back home, stop adding to the statistics. Currently he's being stupid.
After making the error myself, I miss a fully fulfilled marriage.
