About the kids, I can completely relate, and there is no doubt that is the hardest part.
Here is what I tried to do (not always successfully!) For the most part stay strong, smile, keep the routine going and have fun with them.
Be honest, but not so much so that it has to destroy their innocence. I said "Your Dad is struggling with some things right now and that means he is not always making the best choices for our family. You can talk to me anytime about how you are feeling. I am here for you, no matter what." or something along those lines....
When they would say things like "where is Dad THIS time?" I would no longer cover for him. I would say, "I honestly don't know. Feel free to ask him when you see him." and then we would go about our day....
more ((hugs)) my friend. That part is so very hard.
