Yes, Ruled, if you can protect yourself emotionally from his depression, using all these great tools you have learned: detachment, boundaries, focusing on changes YOU can make...you can keep yourself emotionally healthy while he does his work.
If he doesn't do his work, that's another story. But it sounds like you have the tools to deal with that, too.
I'm sorry the pain is still so intense; at least it comes less frequently now. And you know the waves will pass.
