Really? I guess so OT. I can see that it come across as that I suppose.
So if I "set boundaries" and they are crossed, then what? Clearly she's intent on not respecting those boundaries. I've expressed what they are and yet I either have not the strength, conviction or balls to follow through with whatever my reaction to that should be. I guess I am following (or trying to) in my own footsteps when it comes to all that. Focus on self, detachment, GAL and "as if". Nowhere in all that were boundaries. Clearly I didn't have any in the previous sitch.
Sure, I have said I will not accept the dishonesty but then what. She's still been dishonest. Now what? I stop "normal" relations?
I know boundaries are all about ME and what I am willing to accept but they feel a lot like ultimatums to me.
As I said, I actually did accept a lot of what's going on now in this (alleged) A during the the last A. Of course one could say my acceptance contributes to her having another one. Maybe. Dunno.
Maybe boundaries are my true struggle. Maybe I am too weak right now (or always) to stand up for myself and draw lines. I don't see myself as terribly weak but maybe...
OT, right now I am sticking to my gut and giving some attention inward. I am spending way too much time obsessing over her, her behavior and what my response should be to it.
To me, not really the point right now. Maybe it should be.
We have a big weekend working together coming up. I need to get through that and then maybe it's time to start looking at things from a different perspective.
