Thank you all for your postings to me! I really appreciate the advice. No, I don't really know this woman, but.... My ex's friend does & she is NOT a good person. He told me that my ex is afraid of her & she has him under her spell. I didn't say this, someone who has been around them did. Plus, anyone that sends the ex wife an email, thanking her for her husband & for not sueing her for stealing her husband is not a nice person, in fact she is sick! Also sending stuff to let me know how happy they are, that tells another story in itself.
There are mental issues here with my ex. I know he was going thru mlc when all this came about. At the time I didn't know but now that I've read up on mlc, I see all the signs!! He has gray hair, I do not, my dad is 82 yrs old, he doesn't have gray hair that bother my ex. Started having some health issues, his dad passed, a good friend of his was killed in a car wreck & I believe this one iced the cake & thru him overboard, my cousin who was like my sister died of a brain aneurysm at age 47, she was full of life & had everything going. I didn't realize how that effected him at the time. The next year, he took up skydiving, then scuba diving, I saw him getting angry at little things, with his work he was so nitpicky about the least little things, a memo someone wrote & used "and" instead of "the", someone that was under him. Anyway, just stuff like that. I thought it was strange but I had no clue he was going thru mlc b/c I didn't know anything about it at the time.
Then he went on the scuba diving trip & Miss manipulate was on there, told him what he wanted to hear. She told him she was in real estate, they would buy house, he could fix them up & sell them, make a profit. She had dabbled in real estate but wasn't. He thought she had money, found out after they married she was almost bankrupt, they couldn't meet their monthly bills.
So, I do believe people can be controlled by others, especially when they are in this state of mind that my ex was in at the time. I know without a doubt that if this woman had not come along, pursued him this would not have happened. And, yes I do know that he had a part in it also, it wasn't all her but I also know she sent the first email, no, he didn't have to respond but he did. He didn't look for other woman, never had. I know he felt guilty, he was different when he came off that trip, but I couldn't put my finger on it.
As far as him not getting in touch with me, he is not allowed, believe me! His friend has told me she has total control of the phone, internet everything. Knowing him, if he has come out of this mlc, he is too embarrassed to contact. We had a rough divorce, I got just about everything & he was very angry at me b/c of that. I don't think he is happy, I've seen pictures, smile is not real. Someone asked me was he married before me & yes he was. She was having an affair but he was still afraid of her & she doesn't hold a candle to this woman he is with now.
I am working on moving forward, it's been 2 years since the divorce was final & I have come a long ways! I guess I always wanted to have hope, but I'm doing all right. Sometimes I just need to get on here & vent a little bit. I'm not asking for anything but support at a time when I'm a little down. For the most part, I'm ok. I'm not depressed all the time, like I used to be, sometimes things just throw me backwards, like this baby thing & I had to let it out & come to people who have been in similar sitches.
I think my ex will eventually realize what he has done, mistakes he has made but he may also think that I would not take him back & right now, I'm not sure I would.
