Now that I know what marriage is all about, the way to read love lang. and all, he won't give me that chance. Of course he can't do anything until he forgives me for his pain. But you see, he NEVER told me he wasn't happy. He assumed after 13 yrs, i could read him. We were starting to build a house together, why would i have reason to believe that there were problems? He should have filled me in a couple of years ago. I could have worked at fixing my marriage then. That is why I am having a hard time. I feel like he wants me to feel the pain he must have felt all those years.
I am going back through some of your old threads to familiarize myself with what you went through back then. BOY, does this sound familiar. H never told me he was unhappy, and seems to want to punish me for hurting him.
Have you re-read some of your old posts? Not sure if you need to, think about it. Do you need to be reminded of what transpired, what you did that was wrong and what you did that was right?
I ask because I busted my D in 2005 after 2 years of H and OW - and then fell into many of the same patterns - lack of quality time spent with H being the biggest. I wonder if I would be here again if I had kept reminding myself of what happened in the past. Then again, if this is truly MLC, probably nothing I could have done... just a thought for you.
