I understood what you been saying, I was concerned that if I spoke out that she would have an adverse reaction and it would be a set back.
First of all, "adverse reactions" aren't always "setbacks" -- sometimes they signify GROWTH. But I really do think that your wife will, for the most part, respond POSITIVELY to such little "mini-boundaries" that you call her on. In her current state, she's much like a child, and children LIKE structure -- it makes them feel safe.
