Find your voice. Stomp that yard. All that crap.

[AliSuddenly]

I'm speechless. I think it was best that you didnt tell the kids afterall. If Dan started cryting in front of you (thats a new one isnt it?) chances are he did in the restaurant a little and would have wehn you spoke to the kids.

I know he's an arse and you all hate him here, but...he didnt murder anyone, he isnt some evil maniac.. he just fell out of love with you/didnt want to be married anymore. As horrible and painful as that is for YOU, its also horrible and painful for him to have to tell his young kids that it was all his doing and shatter their innocence and belief in him as a man, their Dad and general good guy. We know he left the M, but thats what the kids will focus on if you tell them that. They will then think, why did Dad leave? Was it because I was bad?..... I know I would have at that age. So I dont know about this insisting he tell them it was HIM, is it actually that healthy for your kids to hear. Why apportion blame? Would it be more damaging to their young pysches.

Why not just siimply tell them, we love each other as your parents and love you, but we arent going to be married anymore. I'm not saying he deserves sympathy, I am thinking of the kids here.

I wonder if you insisting he tells them that HE didnt want to be married to you is you forcing him to admit that to his kids as some kind of way to 'get him where it hurts' as K says, to see if he will have a change of heart?? Or maybe its for yourself, for him to admit this was ALL his doing. But would an IC reccommend you tell a 7 year old boy.. YOUR dad left ME.. is that a positive message in all of this mess?? Or do you want Nathan/Sydney to know the stark truth of adult R's at such a young age?

As for you, I am so sorry you had to deal with that, it must be so awful to have your emotions continually tossed around by someone, as K says, that you still havent let go of. You really are a trouper bbj, a strong woman. Sorry for long post and general musings, you know best, as their Mum.

xxx