However, when I listen to what he says about me, it's hard not to get into that pattern, too.
When you are in that pattern, how do you feel about yourself? Are you proud of your actions? I'm guessing no. I found that I can't keep myself from getting dragging in at the slightest body language or tone thrown at me.
Did he say anything to you about the moving out thing or did he rush over last Monday to take more things?