I need help in the biggest way. I feel so helpless

[timehealsall]

Well, I knew it was shortlived.

He sent me an email yesterday wishing me a good day. I replied back wishing him the same.

We spoke briefly a few times.. I ended the conversation (180) and then he sent me an email asking me where my head was at in regards to our R.

I replied back that reiterating what he said to me on Sunday night about not wanting a divorce and that he had lied about wanting a D and that he wanted to get our lives on track. but I also said that I didn't know exactly what that meant?
that I didn't want to play house and make things to appear okay.

well, that set him off. Was I wrong in what I said?

because this just set him off and he went on and on because apparently I was supposed to KNOW that he meant he wanted to work on us as well. I explained to him that he needed to say that especially after all the back and forth he has done and how adamant he has been about NOT wanting to work things out.

Then he goes on to say I'm a bad mother.. I can't handle the kids. They don't listen to me and I just push them off on others (ie my mom).

Then he sends me some stupid song about D and said that he never meant for things to turn out that way yesterday.

WTF just happened here?

So I checked my intel and he reread all of our email exchanges and then I see that he skyped an acquaintenance he has there asking him if he wanted to go out to dinner (that's fine; no biggie) and then the guy asks him where? and H says everywhere.. then the guy says "you'll be making love to [OW's name] later" which then H asks if he can call him through skype and they chat for a bit (too bad I can't hear anything =() and then the the acquaintence deletes the comment from the skype conversation. I'm thinking that H asked to speak to him to clarify that he's not with OW anymore but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that it stung to see that.. especially having the friend refer to my H as "making love" to that wh0re.

No messages/calls or nothing from H since that last email.

I guess it's a good thing that I didn't put all my eggs in the basket in thinking this was finally a good thing for us in our R.

Although it still hurts and I have to admit that a few tears have been shed over it this morning.