CL," I'm getting mixed messages from my W. She complains so loudly, but yet wants to spend time with me. I went out to dinner with her last night to keep her company." She is using you pure and simple--who pays for dinner? She wants a lap dog, male company not a husband. Cl you are not new to all this, be honest with yourself,maybe trying to assert yourself is new but pacifying your wife is a very old habit. If you are so terrified of unpleasantness if you enforce boundaries that upset your wife then put a plan together that will have you as far away from her as soon as possible after you state your boundaries. Personally the fear of living as you are now for the rest of your days would be more terrifying to me, especially when you say you are not afraid of a D. Is that really true? Could you afford to move out and get a lawyer to deal with all communications, just cut and run. You are being abused and bullied by this woman, who somehow has tremendous power over you. Is this your first marriage and hers? As long as you jump when she sends you from the bedroom she will continue to treat you like her whipping boy.I think she has a ponchon for "bad boys" Matilda, not sure why CL would even want to contemplate being intimate with his wife at this stage,did you read what happened a few posts ago? If (and hopefully) when he has a wife/partner who treats him with the love and respect he deserves I am sure he will have no problem with intimacy.I am sure that CL is not the type of man who seeks sex purely for his own gratification and manly needs. Find the courage you need CL and to thine own self be true. Sorry for harsh words but I worry about you.
