At this point (sadly) Luv's H has no desire or intention of working on himself, ending his A's OR working on the marriage.
He has cut her and the children off financially without a care in the world as to how they will eat, get medical care or anything else for that matter. He waited until he was clear across the country to make sure his family had NOTHING. Does that sound like somebody who wants to be a better man at this time?
Yes, it is VERY hard when one spouse realizes there are other options to improve a R but one can only take it so far. On the flip side of that Luv's H took it too far in the other direction and now it is not longer a "rescue" situation but one where her first order of business is protection.
OTMT - you can ignore me on your thread which is why I stopped posting to you as you only seem to like the advice of one person. That is fine. I understand you went to Retro and are trying to use the techniques you learned there but suggesting pursuit and books when Mr. Luv has essentially left his family and hung them out to dry is very puzzling.
No matter what problems you have with your W would you dream of cutting off your W and children and not even leaving them a dime for food? That is beyond cruel and certainly not the way to get anything accomplished except a costly and stressful legal battle.
So, yes, it would hurt to hand a man a copy of a book that can't even muster the courtesy to let his W of almost two decades know he is taking off across the country and while he is gone he is cutting them off.
I don't really know anybody that wants to be divorced but sometimes when there are MANY issues that have an immediate "life or death" consequence we have to do things that we just don't want to do.
Not piling on OTMT, but I am with CG here. There is NOTHING good that could come from giving him a copy of any book like that.
