You are going to need a lawyer. I will tell you this everything you say to cps goes on record.
Right now it will be hard for either one of you to get your D back. It's not something you can just go talk to them about and resolve.
http://chfs.ky.gov/dcbs/dpp/faqchildabuse.htm#5 5. Can a social worker just take a child out of the home? No. Only the police have that authority if they feel that a child is in imminent danger. A judge can issue an emergency custody order (ECO) for a child to be picked up and held for 72 hours before a hearing. KRS 620.040(3)(b) allows a hospital administrator or a physician treating a child to hold that child without a court order but they must request an ECO within 72 hours.
you and your W had two seperate violent incidents how many days apart? they probably have the hospital records for the two nurse maids elbow.
The police probably reported the two violent encounters to CPS.
but here is this
8. What happens to children who are being abused if it is reported? Reports of child abuse will be investigated by DCBS. If substantiated, children may be removed from the home and placed in foster care until their family situation can be evaluated and/or corrected. Treatment services are provided, which may make it possible for children to remain in the home.
that's what I'm talking about. you're going to have to do these services. You need to find out if you can get legal aide or a public defender if you cannot afford an attorney
Now they are saying you will probably have to split up due to the violence in the home. Yep that’s why they are saying divorce. You need a lawyer as soon as possible man. You are going to be in a for long long haul man. You’re going to have to do these services. Ask them for them. If you get your own I.C. or M.C. , they are going to want you to use the doctors, counselors, and therapists they select.
You may get monitored visits. But the second violent encounter really really messed things up dude. The way they feel, if you’re fighting like that with each other and the child is in the middle then that’s a very unhealthy environment for a child. They feel that if you two are not together, then the child could be returned IF YOU COMPLETE THE SERVICES.
The thing is this it’s possible to get D returned if u and W complete the services together. Like I stated earlier it’s usually Parenting Classes, Drug assessment, Psychiatric and Neurology Evaluation, Anger Management, Family Violence, Individual Counseling, and Marital Counseling.
This is going to take a lot of work dude. Before you talk to cps I recommend talking to a lawyer. See what your options are.
waw 36 (spiritual covenant and common law marriage)me 32 together 13 mos. Bomb dropped march 2nd 2010
children SD (8) S (10) S (3) need help from anyone with my sitch
Thanks for checking up. I'm ok and now have a good plan. CPS advised that I give them a alternative guardian until our court date.
W actually advised there was no alternate per CPS and that was the last emergency court date that I could not make because there was no notice for me. They called my house instead of work, so i didnt find out till later.
I have 2 options, W's brothers family, or my sister. I will find out today who to present as an option.
CPS did say after IC and parenting class, everything should be ok as long as there are no more incidents, which there will not be.
I feel better about things now, but I am worried about W who is very scared, depressed, and staying with her boss. My hope is that after IC, parenting class and our next court date she may cool off enough to discuss moving forward.
I still love her very much, i know she needs some help, as I do and want to be a family again. I think I am at a point where DB is going to start going into effect. The thing is how i do get someone who blames me for everything to forgive me.
One of the last things she said was that our M was over the moment she was arrested. She got herself arrested by breaking the contact order, by being hysterical around police and demanding she have my car even though i need it for work.
I dont know how long it will be before she calms down, but i am damn worried about my family.
It is possible she prefers that child is in foster care for now, maybe because her mind is clouded and she doesnt want my family to watch her which is BS.
I just want to do whats best for my daughter, and also for my relationship. For her to say no alternative, was likely a result of her being so freaked out during court, that she was saying something like no one should have my daughter but me.
Well, anyway I am hanging in there and will update when i learn more.
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
Ok i have some stuff to add to this. I have been talking with W's mom regarding all the court stuff and well she seems to think that W wants to let child stay in foster care.
W's mom was trying to contact W's Brother to see if they would be guardian and she has heard nothing. Also, she said my Wife has not contacted her back again regarding having either her Brothers family be a guardian or My Sister.
W's mom believes that if I move forward with having DD stay with my sister that would be against W's wishes.
I am torn and in the dark on this, because if I move forward with having Lawyer file motion in court for emergency hearing to get DD with my sister, it could cause more damage to my W.
I hate the idea of DD being in foster care, but W may have something going with her lawyer which i dont think she does.
My sister thinks I need to go for custody of the child after all this over if I am handed D papers.
It really blows not being able to communicate with W for sake of the child, her feeling im totally responsible for this mess, and not knowing what really is the right move long term.
My gut saids get DD out of foster care anyway possible, but if its against W's wishes who is prob not in a good frame of mind it could hurt any reconciliation attempt.
I have to make a decision tonight about this, I am going to talk to my Family, and hope W's mom has some news about what W may want or if W's brother will be guardian.
I figured if W's brother is guardian it would not seem like I am trying to do something against her wishes, but really its about DD.
I do begin IC tomorrow, and well im looking forward to it because i need to make some major changes in my life.
PLease help if you any advice for me as I feel i have one of the worst sitches possible here. I really need some advice.
M 36 W 29 Together 2 1/2 years married 14 months Daughter 15 months Bomb 4/22/10 Separated since 4/25/10 OM 6/10/10 Hopeful, but moving on
I'm home from work. Let me read your two new posts and then think and reply. Your situation is eerily going in the direction of mine. So trust me when I say u r not alone.
waw 36 (spiritual covenant and common law marriage)me 32 together 13 mos. Bomb dropped march 2nd 2010
children SD (8) S (10) S (3) need help from anyone with my sitch
I'm not going to weigh in on the legal side of things because I'm not a lawyer. However...I do practice medicine and I'm here to tell you that the nurse-maid's elbow is sooooo incredibly common it's not even a "red flag" in the ER. CPS has gone overboard...big time.
They call it "Nurse-maid's elbow" because it was first noticed with nannys (nurse-maids) who were picking kids up by their arm to lift them onto street curbs, stairs, etc. The child's radius is not fully formed and it can slip out from underneath a ligament that holds it in place near the elbow. It is fixed in a 3 second manipulation and the kid is usually back to normal before I can finish the discharge paperwork.
Get some expert medical info on Nurse-maid's and shut CPS down right out of the gate.
If you were talking about spiral fractures, broken bones, etc I'd say CPS is doing the right thing. But..nursemaids??!? Way over the top.
