Only you know when to throw in the towel, only you can make that decision.
The baby thing would have me in a tizzy... I think you're handling it very well. I'm terrified OW will get pregnant - H's XW got 3 kids, I waited and waited to help him with the step kids and we finally started trying when stepkids were old enough, I got pregnant, 3 months in lost the baby, and then boom - bomb... and now he's having unprotected sex with OW.
Anyway, the release recommendation by Oldtheotherhalf may be good, if you go for that type of thing. I wish I could, I hold it all in and that's not good... give it a try if it touches you that it may help. Hugs.
Hugs.