I'm tired of hearing and reading about the "condition" that I'm in. Don't bother writing about it or even to me if that's the topic any more. The fact of the matter is that as a man, I've finally decided that neither you or the kids are going to walk all over me verbally or with your actions any or ever again. Period.
That said, the kids don't like it. They have no problem staying at friends houses for days at a time. I realize I'm their dad. They have to live with what they have and what I have to offer them. You talk about conditional love...well there you have it. If I lived on a billion dollar yacht, I guess everything would be peaches. The comment about every time they are here something gets broken is the truth. It happens...every time. When they learn to accept responsibility for their actions and pay attention to what they are doing and listen to their father instead of discounting everything that comes out of my mouth, then things will get nice...easy...and fun.
OUR kids are at a tough time. The age of resistance to ANY adult input into their lives. They "know" everything and the fact that I don't live with them makes them feel they have the right to dismiss my parenting even more than they used to. And they used to ....and you know it.
As for the assets in the house. I won't lie. It pisses me off that you think you have the right to pick and choose what I can and can't have. Your lawyer even said,"I've been more than generous". And that hasn't even begun to slow down. And I am tired of hearing about your version of what's fair in life. For instance...how about the 5000 bucks "WE" owe APA. Well guess who's paying for that? And right now. They want the f'ing money. So please don't try to put the screws to me just so your boy friend has a place to park his bike. I'll get the stuff out of the garage when I can piece the money together to store it. Not that it's remotely any of your business, but my plan was to use some of my travel money from the trip to Russia, but that has obviously been put on hold.
Now...if you don't like the tone of any of this...tough. I hope you've at least read it all. The fact of the matter is that our kids are who they are because of you and I. S and D are good kids. They have good values and good intentions. They didn't just trip into that when they turned 13 and 15. My son actually said he doesn't want me to teach him anything anymore. My SON!!! He said that to me. I've never felt so unappreciated in my entire life. I will not stop being a father to my children. I refuse. And if it means that for a while they have to hate me even more, then again, I'll pay the price to do what is supposed to be done in our society today. What I think is right. Just as I've tried to do for the entire time you have known me. I have CERTAINLY failed and tripped hugely on occasion. That doesn't mean I'm going to intentionally do it again for the sake of a friendship with my kids. I would LOVE to have both. But I'm their father first. And you know it.
M:47 M:18 D16, S19 1st S 1/08-5/08 Reconciled/May 7, 2008 Left again Nov 9, 2009 I Filed: Nov 17, 2009 Final: April 14, 2010 EX walked away from kids too
