I do find it funny that my h is trying to convince me we should be d. I asked him to tell me what I could have done different. Yes, I know I shouldn't have asked because this is pursuing. But he told me the only mistake I made was marrying him. I told him that he and our m were worth fighting for.
OK, he is trying to convice you (and himself) because that's just what some people do. I have been on the receiving end of such comments myself. It's just easier for him to say it is the right thing than live with the guilt.
If he wanted to know if you still thought the marriage was worth saving or if you were willing to change some things, he would have asked.
It doesn't do any good to ask him what you should have done differently right now. At this point, you aren't the one telling their spouse their relationship is ending while you live in fantasy land.
The best responses to those sort of statements are in the vein of "I'm sorry you feel that way".
You really have to get it into your head that you are going to be alright even if this marriage doesn't make it (in fact, that would be better than the purgatory you are in right now) and start living your life accordingly.
I am not telling you to give up. I am telling you to stop playing this game.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
