You sound like you are doing well. I sense maybe not as well as you would like us to believe. I hope I am wrong, even if I'm not, your inner strength ALWAYS shines through.
Isn't this strange: "One of the last things I told him was, "you're right this is over and I deserve better." He got very angry when I said that."
Why in God's name would he be angry when you are giving him what he wants? It is impossible to figure them out.
Please don't take offense to my statement above about you not being as well as you would have us believe. I'm not saying it right, but I mean it as a compliment. I admire your strength and it does show in your posts. Even when your going through a rough time, it is obvious to me that you will be fine, even better in the long run. I aspire for that myself, for my inner strength to show through. Not only to my W, but my kids and all around me.
Hey IDU - actually I'm not doing well at all. Today is the first day all week that I don't feel awful. I don't even know why I just feel ok.
I do not take any offense in what you said...it's true the WAS is impossible to figure out. I don't know if I "seem" strong to you guys. I don't feel that way but I am trying. I don't want to let what is happening to me and my kids destroy me or make me bitter.
Thank you so much for the compliment.
Luv
M44 H41 M20 T23 3 older teens Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy" EA Nov 09 w/coworker Another PA in Mar 10 I Filed Apr 10 D final Dec 10
I don't know how much the kids can take. For my W, who keeps saying the kids are the most important thing in the world to her, she seem content in the knowledge that I am here to take care of them. How to be ther for my kids and not for her? That's what I am struggling with right now.
Seeing the kids hurt tears me apart. I'm sure it does you too. To us, they are the most important thing in the world. Innocent bystanders who stand to lose the most. Yes, they can learn to deal with time and two parents who are commited to at least make this as painless as possible on them. That is hardly ever the case, though. Their world will never be the same and that is so sad because, to us, it is so avoidable.
More prayers coming your way. I know they help. I KNOW THEY HELP!
How did you find out about the paycheque change? Is this a response to you telling him:
"One of the last things I told him was, "you're right this is over and I deserve better." He got very angry when I said that."
My W told me she was going to sleep in the kids room. I know that isn't a full separation, but to me it might has well have been. So after thinking for a day, I told her that I wouldn't accept just the room - it would be all or nothing.
I wonder if your H hears your comments and body language as certain D. Perhaps, he may be reacting emotionally, too. From what you've said, he has his own take one what is going on and just as you see his faults, he likely sees yours. But he doesn't have people around him telling him to stay M.
The shock must be there, but when you planned to file for a divorce and end your marriage completely, didn't you expect this?
Mr. Luv can be as angry as he likes however there are a few facts you are missing OTMT.
I am not going to list them here as they are not my facts to tell but you are way off base with the timing of the talk they had a few nights ago (and BTW, Luv never told her H her plans to file) and the BS he pulled with finances. Mr. Luv has this little financial plan in place LONG before "the talk" as records indicate.
And no, it doesn't matter what anybody planned to do or did... one cannot cut off support without legal orders in place and not leave a household with THREE children without a penny in the bank and no way to even buy food.
And no, it doesn't matter what anybody planned to do or did... one cannot cut off support without legal orders in place and not leave a household with THREE children without a penny in the bank and no way to even buy food.
I totally agree. Kids or no kids, it is immature and very controlling - regardless of why. I hope some collecting of facts will help her understand what response would be the best for her and her family.
