Hi gang! Just stopping by so you can all give me a whack and tell me to keep my mouth shut!
The kids and I were a my MIL's last night for pizza. D8 brought up the fact that it is our anniversary next week and she wanted us to do something for it. I laughed and said that if anyone goes out it will be daddy and I. My MIL said, oh, I forgot it was coming up and then, you'll have to remind H about it. I said that I had mentioned it to him before he left.
Then she said, are you going out? I said that I planned to ask him if we could do something upon his return from hunting. (She did offer to watch the kids though - even overnight if we want!- although that implies more than my H has admitted to anyone about us so far )
Now though, I will have to make sure to bring it up when he gets here on Tuesday night, otherwise she will ask him about it when she talks to him.
See, it is hard not talking to her about H at all as she has been a good friend and we get along great. When this all started I turned to her. But since H and I started having our late night visits and , I haven't said hardly a word to her about anything. When I do, she seems skeptical and negative.
She wants things to work out, but since her H left her when my H was very young, she has always said not to get my hopes up. However, her H had multiple OW and left for one of them. My H doesn't have one at all, never has, and has shown all of the signs of returning.
Anyway, I just have to remind myself that she is my MIL, and we are close, but she is not someone I can make comments like that too at this time. Maybe never again - even as things begin to work out for H and I.
Thanks for listening folks. You are great!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
totite, I was wondering if you had read "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge. I see that your H's dad had OW, my H's dad did too. Anyway, it is a heartfelt book that kind of peeks in at the H's heart as to why they do/did what they do.
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Well, I hope your H had a good hunting trip and comes home in a great mood.
Good luck with the anniversary thing. That is tough. David worked on ours. Didn't even send a card or email.
I did give him a card though, nothing too mushy or anything but we always keep cards to one another and I didn't want us to look back at this year and I have not given him any cards.
Keep us posted!
I'm sending you good luck vibes and wishes!!!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Hi gang! Guess what? My H just called from hunting! Since we hadn't heard from him I figured he wasn't getting a signal. The signal was poor at best, but caused a few laughs too!
He called to ask me what time I needed to go on the radio Wednesday because he would get the kids to day care. (I am going on the air to promote one of the projects that I am working on) He said that he called in and took the day off. He also made a few suggestive comments - including one that I should go shopping (for lingerie!)
Made my day and had to share it!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
Well, HoldingOn, kick back and listen to this story - back at the beginning of October I was offered a job with our school district. I asked my H to come over and look at the offer with me before I decided anything. He said it was my decision. I countered with the fact that it was a financial decision and that we have always made those together. So he agreed to come over later that night.
He dropped the kids off and left saying he would stop back later. In the meantime he went over to a friends house and had a couple of beverages. He came back after the kids were in bed. He came in and sat on the couch next to me (which isn't normal for him) and I pulled out a notebook on which I had done some math about the job offer.
It turned out that the job was an hourly position with no benefits. Our kids are in child care 2 days a week and I would have to pick up another day to do the job, but I would have school breaks and the summer off. However, it would have cost us more for child care than I would bring home.
In addition, I had just successfully written a grant for a coalition that I belong to and they wanted to pay me to do two short-term projects. I would make almost 3x the salary of the school job doing these two gigs. He said "You are worth more than they are offering. You need to be paid what you are worth and get benefits too. Turn down the job".
Then he went into the kitchen looking for a snack. I followed him and we ended up talking R. He said that he almost didn't come over. I asked why and he said it was hard to come over because he was afraid of what he would do.
I told him that I didn't think we should ignore the good parts of our R while working on the not so good parts. He admitted that he missed the kids and our home and even me sometimes. This was a huge breakthrough. I told him it was all part of a sinister plot on my part - LOL. I also told him that I wouldn't pressure him and tell him that ILY all the time - and I haven't.
Needless to say, I gave him a big hug and we ended up getting intimate. Then, the following Wednesday, he had a rough event occur at work, and called me to come over late again (it's on my thread). We talked for two hours about it and he stayed a little longer ...
So, since then, he and I have been getting together for late night alone time at least 2-3 nights a week. I joke on here that we are having an EA with ourselves - and we are. It's not just about either, although that has been fun, it is about cuddling, watching movies, talking in general terms not R...
So, now that he has been gone since Friday, it's no wonder that I am excited that he called this morning and that he has suggested what we might do on Wednesday while the kids are at day care and school.
Now I have to see if I can make it to the lingerie store before my meeting this afternoon.
Good luck HoldingOn - stop by any time. I am hoping to be the next to post that my H is coming home - my PMA is high and that is what counts!
Opt - thanks for the visit. I hope you can go home early, take a few Motrin and get some rest and plenty of fluids! Take care of yourself!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
Hi Totite, How are you? I'm trying to make some rounds. I got some time, and I needed to get out of my head as it was full of angst. Things sound like they are on their way for you! I hope you have a good anniv. ! karen
)
, I haven't said hardly a word to her about anything. When I do, she seems skeptical and negative. 
Didn't even send a card or email.
