This all happened really recently. It's normal for you to have this level of anxiety and anger right now. If you want to not show that to him for whatever reason, you will have to hide out on the days that you feel worse.
H did not come today after our e-mail discussion last night, which was a relief to me. I didn't want to either have to see him or plan my day around avoiding him. He'll come later in the week, maybe on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings, while I'm at work. I think this is better for both of us for now.
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Sounds like you are learning to tell from your breathing when you are getting more anxious. Did the IC have some good tips on what to do when that happens?
I am getting better at recognizing the signs of my increasing anxiety. IC said to use any and all techniques I know to calm myself down (breathing, doing something enjoyable, visualizing my favorite things/happy moments, etc.). At our next session this coming Tuesday, she and I are going to work on some type of breathing training. I hope I learn it quickly!
