My WAW - Chat/Text Msg affair with her ex

[Dan1977]

What a tremendously difficult weekend!! I am at the end of my rope I feel like. She completely fabricated a story about going down for dinner with her family and then stayed all night with OM. She turned off her phone and wouldn't talk to her sister who she planned to meet up with on Friday night. My wife informed her sister that OM was going to meet up with them and her sister disapproved. My wife then never called her sister and turned her phone off all Friday night into Saturday afternoon. My wife's story is she went out for drinks with OM, then drove back home and stayed at a park and went for a long walk. I don't really believe any of what she says anymore, it's all a fabricated lie it seems. I had the kids on Friday/Saturday, so I took them to Chic-Filet so they could play and her sister and mother wanted me to come down to their house so I could talk.

Let me tell you, it was a huge huge load off my chest to finally be able to really talk to someone about what has been going on the last few months. I feel a little more stable and not on the verge of breaking down even though my wife has done some very hurtful things this weekend. I stayed at her parents til late Saturday night around midnight or so and talked to them for several hours telling them everything that has been going on. I let them know how much I loved their daughter and I'm not trying to point fingers and make her look bad, I just want my wife back so I can prove to her I can be the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with. They were all very understanding and totally felt sorry for our situation and want to help anyway possible. They know her very well and my wife is a very stubborn woman, especially now when she's so closed off. My best move so far is to just not pursue her, because when I do confront her and just want to talk, she wants to pick a fight and turn it into a confrontation trying to give herself ammunition to not want to be with me.

Around 8:00, my wife started texting me because I had the kids with me. The texts started out very hateful and threatening. She told me if I didn't bring the kids home right away, I better not go to work next week because she is going to take them away from me. She knows that is my weak spot, I am hopeless if I lose my kids. She uses them as a weapon almost. She tried to make it like I was keeping them from her. I calmly replied that I was not trying to keep them from her or be secretive, I was just spending some time with my kids. She was pretty irrational with me, she acted like I wasn't tell her where they were, but she never even asked me, "where are you with the kids today". I eventually told her I was at her parents house and let her know I just really needed someone to talk to and they were so nice to talk to me and have dinner with me. I was afraid to tell her I was there, and as I thought she instantly fired back I was trying to get her family against her. I told her that was not the case, we are all worried about her and love her and feel like she is confused and is going down a difficult path in life.

I am trying as hard as possible to be the better person in this situation even though my wife is entangled in this affair, which seems to have gone from emotional to possibly physical =( I can't quite decide if it's a deal breaker for me if I find out she had sex with OM, it's very hard to think about right now in the heat of all this.

When I got home last night around 1:30 am, I went to bed with the kids on the couch downstairs. We slept there for about an hour and then she came down and got my little girl and took her upstairs and said it wasn't fair I wasn't letting them sleep in their beds even though my son wanted to sleep on the couch with me. She has taken down our wedding pictures, and put her wedding ring in the box and put it on my bathroom sink. She left the debit card at the bar her and OM were at Friday night so I had to report it lost. She left me a note not to renew it because she doesn't want "my" money.

Her sister and mother were going to come up today, but we decided taht was probably not best and she does need some space. I have not said one word about this weekend to her an have answered when she asks me a question, but do not try to engage in conversation with her. She cooked dinner and after I finished I told her thank you for cooking, it was good and she said your welcome. I am scared about going back to work tomorrow, but I really do feel a little more stable after talking to her family. I am scared she will try to take the kids somewhere, but I have no idea where.

She has really put me in a pickle financially with all that is happening. A few weeks ago we were planning a vacation, and we decided we want to go somewhere tropical so she convincned me we should go back to Jamaica where we were married. I booked the $3500 trip and we purchased like $700 of clothes. We were supposed to leave June 1st, now I pretty much assume we're not going and I'm not sure what the hell I am going to do. I know the airline tickets are non-refundable and part of the hotel is. I'm so confused!!