Thanks everyone for the warm welcome to piecing. I know that this is where I belong. I read many of your threads but don't always post as I am learning from all of you and don't always have anything to add. I will offer encouragement and support though.
Well, I told Opt that I was going to post three positives so far the past few days, here goes:
1. H called Monday morning in between meetings to find out if I wanted to play Halloween. [I didn't know he was going to call but I surprised him too since I had gone out and purchased bunny ears, tail and bow tie for some future fun. Paired it with some a white lace bustier and voila'.]
2. When H picked up kids for Tuesday night visit he didn't rush in and out as usual.
3. Last night, when kids called H to say goodnight I mentioned that my shoulders were too sore to lift my arms because I had finished painting both of the boys bedrooms. Later he called and asked if I wanted a neckrub. He came over and gave me one and then stayed for a while to watch TV and .
Do you sense a pattern here?
Well, I am all for keeping the great parts of our relationship healthy . Besides, who would have thunk it that we would be having such fun after the kids are in bed? We have been lucky so far that none of them have woken up and wondered around.
So I continue to wait patiently for some sign that H is considering moving home. In the meantime, I continue to work on my goal of decorating and decluttering our house. This gives me a great sense of accomplishment and speaks volumes in one of my H's LL.
I'll need your help in the next few weeks as our anniversary approaches - November 23. I don't want to get my hopes up that he will be home by then althought that would be the ultimate. I am planning to wait until closer to the day but am planning to ask him if we can do something together to mark the occassion.
So PATIENCE, PATIENCE, PATIENCE.....
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
Goodmorning, I'm with you, waiting for H to decide when and if he wants to come home. In the meantime, just like you, I'm going to work on decluttering our home also. Joined that group~flylady and think it is just what I need to get myself together! Have starte declyttering yesterday. I could wait. I needed to get started and plan on working on it more this afternoon. Now if I can just get the other 3 people in my life to quit the cluttering!
And while i'm at it, I'm decluttering my life!
Sounds like great positives to be a good baby steps, brought a smile to my face this morning!
Good Morning. Well, yesterday was weird at best. My emotions were all over the board - I was tired from the previous late night , I ache from all of the home improvement projects I am working on, the kids were fighting, etc.
H picked up kids and it was fine. I mentioned that I was going to a meeting at church and while there all of my emotions came to the surface and I ended getting teary in front of a few hundred people. Of course, they all think I was emotional about the subject at hand (our pastor resigned at the recommendation of a synod committee) but the emotions were just bottled up from my sitch at home. I hadn't connected with this pastor as he isn't a one-on-one kind of guy - so I didn't even feel that I could turn to him about my H and I.
When I stood up to make comments, I commented on the importance of clear and open communication and keeping people informed of the process and decision making...that it is not so much about what happens in the end, but how you get there. Can you see how that can translate to my home sitch with a WAH who didn't speak up when he was unhappy?
Anyway, when I got home H and kids were here and I acted AS IF everything was fine. Got the kids to bed and then called H about weekend schedule and ended up crying on the phone to him. Told him I was not really all that upset by church sitch but by how it translates to home sitch. I told him I felt confused and unsure of how I fit into things. He said we could talk more tonight.
Needless to say, I am embarrassed about getting teary in front of the folks at church - but in the long run I could care less. I left after my comments but my mom said today that several people came up and told her and my dad that they appreciated my comments and that they came from the heart. (Little do they know)
So now I feel like an idiot about rambling to my H, and we will see what tonight holds. I am going to play it by ear as always and may just tell him "never mind". But they are honest emotions so...
Needless to say, today will be a high decluttering day since I have alot of nervous energy to expend. I have already done 2 loads of wash, worked on my consulting gigs, packed up all of the Halloween stuff, and done a load of dishes. My poor body can't keep up with what I want to get done. I may have to ask for another backrub!
Keep me sane folks. My PMA is still high - it just got knocked around a bit. I refuse to let it get low.
I can't blame this on PMS, but maybe I should start listening more when you guys talk about premenopause - I am 40 now after all
Gotta run to the bus stop and pick up S5. It's always great to have him come flying off the bus and into my arms!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
If you run out of things to do with your energy you can come to my house!
I think you should carefully share with H. My poor communication is I don't share with David and expect him to mind read and then I get upset and it spills out VERY INAPPROPRIATELY.
Glad the PMA is up and Have a GREAT EVENING!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Well, I think your H needs to know how things are going with you, emotionally, as long as you do it in a non accusatory way and do not confuse feelings with actual thought. So tonight, if he mentions the issue be open with him, but do not make him feel guilty about it. They are your emotions...
I am not sure that I am making myself clear.
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
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