Are there signs?

[Wildaces81]

Why then do you feel the need to file? Why are you going to give up already? Why not stop feeling crap*y about the sitch and really and I mean really look at yourself. Stand up, man up, and say F** It. I am gonna do what I want to do. Do you really think that filing will fix this? Do you really think that filing will allow you to move forward? IMO - YOU decided when you move forward. YOU decide what Wild wants! You buddy make the choice in your life.

I feel like filing because I don't want her any more. I don't want anything other than a hello and a goodbye from her. I feel as though I am done. I want to move on. And I cannot do that while I wait for her to file. I know if you read through my sitch you will see me say how much I love her and how much I want to work this out but when someone not only cheats on you, not once, not twice but three times. Don't you think it is time to move the hell on? She isn't going to change. She has made me feel like I was the one that always needed to change. Why? I told her I loved her everyday. I told her how much I think she is beautiful and how much appreciate her. Yes I did make mistakes, yes I did become depressed because of my professional life. But that give no one NO ONE the right to cheat, or treat the other person like they dont matter. I haven't filed yet. I have other things that are more important to do right now like get back into art school. But I have been feeling this way for a while now. I am tired of being treated like crap. I am tired of the doom and dispare. So I have decided to move the hell on. I'm not filing yet though. I have to think about it. I know it is a huge decision. But when someone tells you flat out that they aren't going to come back that they aren't going to change. That they "need to work on myself" yet do nothing to improve on themselves other than go out and drink Wednesday night to Saturday night. I know that I am fighting a lost cause. I see it. I know I do.