Stay calm No criticism No sarcasm No profanity No raised voices Nothing critical about the other person Stay focused One issue at a time No conversation after 9 pm If you break a rule, apologize and correct it No "why" questions. Instead say "Help me to understand" or "How else coule we do this". No conversation about issues in the bedroom No physical threats, violence, posturing,or clenching of fists Become totally aware of non-verbal cues: Looking at the television/computer, no rolling eyes, keep eye contact One person speaks and the other repects with nothnig added After the issue is discussed, affection (a hug) and a verbal response eg "Thank you for trying". Once a week have a conversation about an issue. Talk every day no longer than 15 minutes No issues, fun things.
After issue is discussed there are 2 questions to be asked: 1.How does it affect the relationship? 2.What options do we have?
List options and throw out all but top 2-3. Come up with a gameplan for each option.
