I know that I am being painted as the bad guy even if I am not. Change that? I don't how I would go about doing that. I would like the answers to that. It is a difficult place for me to exist in. I wish I knew a way to break free from this place. For now it is where I reside trying to minimize the negativity that it could be causing for my M.
I have already thought about the counseling sessions, and I will discuss this with counselor when we are able to talk. We have kept missing each other for some reason. He said he would call back today, but he never did. I guess he was busy. What do you mean by a "matyr complex?"
I do invite her when we go somewhere. It is her choice to go or not.
Thanks for the input.
"Martyr complex" is that you put yourself in the position of Jesus Christ where you believe the world is out to get you.
Eventually, you will get tired of her game. You will believe and know that you deserve and can get alot more from another lady. You will feel that you never should have been put in this position. There are alot of different types of women out there and many of them want a good guy.
I have a feeling in your couseling sessions it can end up appearing that the counselor and the wife gang up on you. How to prevent this here? How to prevent it in other situations. My wife was good at that game, actually "triangulating" ( look that up in the dictionary ), against me in nearly any social situation. It is a huge disadvantage.
However there is a huge potential advantage later, as having been used to getting cheated and triangulated on in most situations... When you have an actual partner who is going to stand by you in most situations its going to feel like a huge positive boost in retrospect. Life WILL BE GOOD. If the wife does not want to be a good partner, we can find another who would LOVE to be a good partner.
Life is too short to line up with someone who is going to slow you down and impede you on purpose.
Give it some more time, get your plan together. The plan is such that you are strengthening and building yourself even in the face of sure demise for this situation.
