Yep did that long ago to all who would listen. (which may have been a bad thing, but resulted in OM having a rubbish time with hardly anyone talking to him).
So exposed at my and OM workplace and family on the day I found out.
However, just got a txt from one of my colleagues who tells me that the OM prev beau is back at work in our dept. She's looking very hot apparently. She was "the one" for him, right up till last Xmas, just a few weeks before it was all over in my marriage and he was with my wife. Wonder how long it will take before they're sleeping together again. Oh what a wonderful cataclysmic threesome that could become!
Imagine a shift with the OM, the OM's previous beau x 2 and me all in the same place! Fabulous!
Last edited by lees; 04/22/1007:50 PM.
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
I'm just planning on having my popcorn ready for a ringside seat when OM is caught with his previous, and my STBXW finds out. Dare say it won't be such attractive behaviour to her from the other side.
Anyone else want tickets?
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
Having a bit of a downer today. Wondering about the STBXW reading that letter about the money she owes me and the consequences of a CCJ on her career, which would be really quite damaging. She'd be obliged to let her employer, her professional association etc know if it went as far as actual court, and according to my parents who are also accountants it would be career suicide.
Am I being too harsh with this? I actually do really need the money. I only have �20 till pay day to survive on this month, and next month is unlikely to be any better. I've been emailing her once a week for ages asking for the money and get no response.
Do I really want her to hate me? I still certainly want her to feel just an ounce of the hurt she's caused me.
Have also been having more thoughts recently of "am I really as done with her as I thought I was?" Can I hang on until the affair has gone it's natural course and ended, even though that might actually be longer than we were married, and knowing that the end of it is unlikely to actually mean any recovery of my marriage, or at best is the start of a very long hard road with still a high percentage failure rate?
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
Anyone out there to help with how to handle this financial stuff?
I'm feeling pretty rubbish again today, but have agreed to go out walking with a friend, so no option but to get out of bed and do it. Busy week ahead so I can't wallow anyway.
I'm tired physically, tired of the dreams, the constant waking up and my sitch being the first thought in my head. Tired of the "acting as if" which seems to be all I can currently manage.
Can't get out of my head that I want to hear her say "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have got married to you, I made a huge mistake" at the very least. I want to hear her say she has regrets. I want to hear her say she feels at least some pain, at least a small measure of what I've been through, as it seems all she has is fun and laughter and holidays with OM. I want the money she owes me. And often I just want her out of my life. Erased. A non person.
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
Popped into the in laws again today as was passing with a friend after a walk in the woods. She has the letter, confirmed by FIL. He was again extremely vocal about his disgust for her. Apparently she said that the OM would 'pop in and check on him' at his hospital appt in a few weeks, which he is also disgusted by. And for the first time the BIL voiced his opinions. He is seriously on the warpath apparently.
I asked him about whether she had said anything about my intention to take her to small claims court. He just said "what goes around comes around." He has no intention of bailing her out apparently, and again reiterated that the OM would never be welcome at the farm, or the BIL farm. Not that the OM's Gucci shoes would ever stand the farm muck there anyway......
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
Oh what to do about taking her to court?!? Does anyone have any advice? Beginning to think that being in the UK means I'm exempt.
Don't know why I'm feeling so rubbishly needy today. Or why the feelings of wanting her back that I'd managed to recently control somewhat better have welled up so strongly.
I'm stuck in limbo again. On the one hand want to do the online civil court application to get my money, to maybe wake her up to some consequence, to hit her where it hurts. On the other hand, I don't want to hurt her, it will be easy for her to turn around and label me as impatient and nasty. But it will also be a 180 that I'm not putting it off and just letting things happen because I can't be bothered - she always dug at my laid back nature when it comes to getting things done.
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
Don't take her to court as a punishment. If you need the money and she has been non-responsive then you take her to court because it is the only remedy left to you.
Take responsibility for your life. The fact that it will have negative consequences for your W is on her. She chose the actions so she chose the consequences. You do what you need to do in order to move forward in your life.
That's my two pence.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
