My H seems very committed to the R and seems to be spending more time at my home...however, he still can not give up the security blanket of his apartment. He keeps claiming that he needs solitude sometimes and with my kids (and sometimes their friends) here, he can't always get that at my house. Seems like an excuse to me when he has lots of space to escape to. Oh well, I don't seem to have the energy to deal with any of it now.
He is right, he is still processing, Upside. The fact he is spending more time at your home, is still a good sign that he's coming forward, although a little at a time.
It takes them a long time to come back, and they seem to do it slowly. Just go on with your life as you have; being there when he needs you. The times will come closer and closer together, and eventually he WILL give up that apartment, coming home completely and totally.
Please be patient with him, he's trying hard, but this is hard on him too. Again, it's a fine balance.
I can understand the loss of some of the enthusiasm on your part, it seems to take SO long, but it will be worth it all in the end.
Well, two major changes have happened in my own situation; my husband is back on his feet in physical therapy, and our 23 year old son has bought his first house!
I can see more changes coming in time, but it will be all right, eventually.
Glad to see you post a positive update, Upside.
Have a good one.
Remember, as each person is different, every MLC/Transition is different..what works for one may not work for another. Most of the time it is trial and error for ALL involved.
