Appreciate the advice so far. After hearing from OM's wife on Monday, who exposed the full extent of my wife's affair with OM to me, I confronted my wife on Wednesday. She didn't deny that they were moving in together and that she had feelings for OM, even though we've only been separated eight weeks. Didn't bother questioning her whether EA or PA because both are bad, especially when combined with the fact that my wife and OM are now living together. I'm sure it's both.
Debated but decided to "out" my wife to her two best friends and to her parents. One best friend believed me and the OM's wife, but the other best friend and her parents seem to still be giving my wife the benefit of the doubt, perhaps even defending her (especially the other best friend). I thought this would happen (as happens to others apparently because I just read the "Exposure" thread and saw where other people are blamed when its their spouses who are having affairs). Don't know whether I should bother contacting the OM.
When my wife left me, even when I thought she had just had an EA, I still hoped that we might reconcile during our separation. Now that I know she's kept so much from me, and that she's now living with the OM, I don't know if I would want that if given the opportunity. I don't think I will be because the wife really has shown no remorse, regret, or willingness to work on our marriage.
I've had no contact with my wife since Wednesday. I'm thinking that's the way I should keep it for a while. On the other hand, if I'm to believe some of the details about OM given to me by his wife, he's not a great catch, and so I still worry about my wife's well-being while she's with him. Should I try to be friends with her just to keep tabs on her? I personally think she's gotten more than she bargained for, even though she thinks that what she wants for now.
