W still wants separation, need to DB more

[OfficerInNeed]

Quick history
W wants separation/divorce after years of verbal, mental abuse and controlling behavior. We have been together for 10 years and W said it has gone on for the full 10 years. I took her for granted and made her feel unappreciated. We still had great times and never imagined life without each other. My W loved me unconditionally and just hoped one day I would change. Shortly after we got married she realized that things remained the same so she wants out of the marriage. Now my W feels as if 'she wasted 10 years of her life', 'we got married for all the wrong reasons' and my wife has told me 'I love you but I am not in love with you' , 'too little too late'

I'm not 100% sure if it was puppy or someone else but there's a very high chance of your spouse being interested in or actually seeing someone else when they say these "magical" words.

I love you but I'm not in love with you.

I care for you but I'm not excited about you.
I know this because I'm currently excited by someone else right now and that's who I want and that's who I'm pursuing so please stop chasing me, I don't want you anymore, I don't know how else to tell you this and you don't seem to get the point.

You are right. That is what I had been told. I combated what was said to be an EA. I agree it was but my W is so naive she did not see it anything more than a "friend." The OM had told my W things he said to his W and turns out my W said same things to me.

My W leaves for work same time everyday. On days I am off work, I watch her walk out the door. My W TM when she has arrived at work, same time everyday. On nights I have work, I meet her at the parking lot and drop her off in front of her work place.

On nights I have work and she does not...my parents are our neighbors and had not seen her ever leave to go anywhere when I had already left for work.

When my W leaves work, she TM tells me she is on her way home. She arrives home same time everyday. When she gets home she eats, sleeps or watches TV with me, then sleeps...ALL DAY. On days she does feel up to doing something, we do it together.

I will not discount the idea of being in a PA or EA while AT WORK.... however a great friend of mine is her co-worker and tells me nothing is going on. I know a few officers who work in this airport who monitor the cameras and work the security check point who have monitored the situation for me and report nothing going on....