I guess I should tell you guys what happened yesterday. ... I told him everything I needed to get off my chest. It was about 45 mins of me telling him what I liked about our marriage and what I didn't like. I explained to him I would not let him rewrite our history - he agreed. I brought up what he's been doing and he still avidly denies any PA. I do not believe that for one second.
Wow, yes, I'm glad you filled us in- this is a lot. Was D in the car while you were talking? I'm glad you got a chance to speak your piece. I think all of us need to do this and be heard at some point- whether it sinks in or not with them. Did it feel good or anything to get it out there? He probably feels guilty when he thinks about what kind of man he is to be in a PA and will deny it vehemently.
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He is involved with some other woman now and not the original one (I think) He was at her house till 4am on a friday night then again till midnight on that next Monday so something is definately going on. He swears he's done nothing and says he's tired of me accusing him ha! who's tired?
Oh jeez, that is so hard, I don't know how you deal with this, Luv. I can't even imagine what you've gone through due to him.
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He said one thing that hurt bad but what did I expect? I said, "you have abandoned me and the kids" he said, "I don't appreciate you saying I abandoned the kids..I want to be here I just don't want to be with you." ouch - last nail driven in. I said, "where does this anger come from?" I said, "what did I do to you?" he replies, "nothing I'm just done."
I got a similar one from my H when I said "it seems like you are trying to get away from me and D when you go hide in your video games" and he said "No, just trying to get away from YOU." So I feel your pain. I think they pick the most hurtful thing they can to tell us- even if it's not true. This man loved you once, I'm sure. His behavior now leaves a lot to be desired.
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He kept saying "why are you referring to this being the last time you talk to me?" I thought to myself...why do you care I thought you were done!
Again, I totally understand. Like why did my H search all over to find me here in DB and read my thread? They don't want us, so why do they Fing care????
Or they don't WANT us, want us, but they want the things we do for them- drive to the airport, etc. Why they don't realize they can't continue to have those things if they reject us is beyond me.
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Anyway he said he understood (with some of the things I told him) and I gave him a goodbye - the last hug he will ever get from me
A very sad Luv....
I'm so, so sorry Luv. Those "lasts" are heartbreaking to think about- whether you know they're the last or not. It may not be the last- but maybe for awhile- and I'm glad you got it in for YOU, so you have it to remember, even if it's terribly sad right now.
Keep journalling and giving us details over the weekend--
((((Luv))))
When the men on the chessboard Get up and tell you where to go; And you've just had some kind of mushroom And your mind is moving slow; Go ask Alice... I think she'll know.
