Time for darkness.... (thread number 3)ears open

[james217]

I didn't see any list of the ways you pursued her. It is WAY more than text or phone calls.

You have helped her with her resume, met her when and where she wants you to be, talked about her b-day (her b-day should be ignored and not mentioned) and basically you gave her a full access pass to all your potential future plans.

Your W has zero interest in working things out with you right now. That much is obvious. What she does want is somebody to fall back on (you) and she likes having somebody around when she needs/wants them (financial help, resume help, sex, lunches and dinners out and an emotional sounding board when she chooses). Otherwise she wants nothing to do with the M. She gets jealous of you talking to other women because she is nervous she will not be in control of you anymore if you find somebody else.

I don't think what you are doing is DB'ing at all. The two of you are spending way too much time together, you are doing what she wants and when, you are talking and communicating way too much and that is not good.

Let her know you might give her a call in a few weeks once you get settled in your new job then drop the rope, block her from your phone and focus on you. I guarantee if you do that the drama on her end will increase 10 times over. And you will ignore it all.

thanks for pointing that out ms. C.G. *sighs*

It is really really hard not to help. Or want time with her and things like that. I feel so guilty about some of the things that occured between us.

The thing I feel most guilty about is sd8. Second not getting her the antidepressants. There are so many little guilty feelings I have. I wasn't an awful H I think for the most part I was pretty good but I could have done alot better.

the drama will increase if I do that? I can't take anymore drama. that's part of the reason I've started just not argueing anymore.

I really do think the meds are affecting her too. She is supposed to be on a freaking antidepressant with it. *sighs*

I feel really powerless in this situation. But the only thing I can control is me. I just have to keep saying that repeating it and trying to appply it.

I'm going to read your new thread sometime tonight