Number 8's Revelations, Mistakes, and New Methods

[flowmom]

You're not going to intellectually convince him to reconcile. It's going to have to come from him. Of course, what you can do to help this is to be the 8 that he fell in love with, do any 180s that you need to do for YOU, GAL, be unpredictable, etc. Oh and detach . Reconcilers, esp LBW, always seem to pin their success on detachment, GAL, and 180s.

One thing that concerns me a bit about your strategy is that your H might be liking the communicating you because he wants pseudo-friendship and enough connection to assuage his guilt. It could be that your communicating and being open with your feelings is working for him, but not in a way that's going to trigger a reignition of his romantic interest in you. Think back to courtship-era 8 and think about what attracted him to you.

I think that if I was more open about my emotions it might feel comfortable to H because he'd have a sense of where I'm at. It's possibly a bit unsettling for him that he has no idea what's going on with me...but I'm hoping that's good because it introduces doubt into his mind: "maybe I don't know her as well as I think I do...maybe she has changed".