elfie, I could have written what you did almost word for word as it is my sitch almost exactly as far as H felt. We have a whole lot more kids though. lol
I will be interested in the answers you get to your 180 question. I have been very dim unless to do with kids or finances.
One of the things I read about MLCer's that was rather interesting is below. I could see now that my H probably felt this way about our son's even though he was never like that pre MLC.
Quote:
Depression sign #27
ML'ERS BECOME VERY COMPETITIVE WITH LOVED ONES
When a spouse is in mid life crisis, their LBS as well as other close family members become the enemy. Ml'ers are constantly comparing their loved ones with themselves. Many times they fall short and this leads to further insecurity and self-doubt. During their journey, they are out to prove that they are important and admired and become very competitive. They will withhold compliments/achievements toward important family members at this time. They begin to choose people in their lives that will make them feel good about themselves. Usually this means choosing people who are less accomplished and lower in character in order to make themselves feel better about themselves.
In the beginning of my ex's mid life crisis, he went up to my 17 year old son and informed him that he would "never be as successful, handsome and more accomplished than him". This was so out of character for my ex because he had always wanted his kids to far exceed him in every way.
