I dont want to put my life on hold for this man anymore. I have to start enjoying life. I wasted to many years already. I pray I can keep this attitude.
As a woman who has experienced a MLC'er that has gone through the OW Withdrawal, I know how you feel and have been there.
I have to ask a question regarding this issue... my husband has returned to where myself and my children live and has just got a job, we have lmited contact, usually with regards to the children or finances. He had mentioned that his PA has ended, he is very down and after reading some threads I can see this is normal. He is very cool with me and I find that hard to deal with. When he returned last time we were closer and spent time together and withthe children, this time he is very detatched. How do I react to this, is he letting me know he is not longer interested in me? Not sure what to do next...
Hi forever, I'm finding that my H is acting kind of cold as well at the moment. Mind you he is deep in his OW withdrawal/depression (it's only been 2 weeks since they split up). How long has it been for your H?
Talked to H on the phone several times yesterday (mainly about business) and he stopped by for about 5 minutes to drop off some work stuff. Interactions are friendly, but that's about it. Just like friends/business partners. No hugs and kisses when he comes...and he used to while the affair was on, it just stopped since he asked to R (how weird). I wasn't initiating any greeting XO but maybe I should and see what happens. Any opinions?
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
How do I react to this, is he letting me know he is not longer interested in me? Not sure what to do next...
No! He is NOT letting you know that he is not interested. He is depressed. Reread the 6 stages of MLC and you will see that even though depression is part of all the stages it also has its own stage. There is two different stages of depression. OM/OW withdrawl and "depression" stage following replay prior to "MLC withdrawl" HB explains it better in the 6 stages than I can do.
As far as what to do. Act normally, friendly, upbeat Stay detached with no expectations.
After you re-read the 6 stages if you have any questions come back and repost and we can try to answer.
H called me this morning....just to tell me that he is still low energy, and that he doesn't have any food at home, he is going to have to go shopping. And that he needs to pay his utility bill but doesn't have the actual bill, it's at my house. I said that I will be taking D to her activity in the afternoon and could drop it off on my way.
An hour later he calls again reporting that he is at the grocery store and still needs to go to the vegie store. I said "good you are getting your groceries done" and he said "Will you still come later? Yupp.
In both of the calls he sounds sad/down, no enthusiasm...
Strange...he is calling me for no apparent reason, just to report to me what he is doing. I've noticed this in the past week as well. I guess I shouldn't analyze this...at least he is calling lol
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Thanks SA I agree, it can't be bad that he calls me...doesn't matter what his reason for the call is right now...it's just kind of strange...but what isn't in this situation.
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
