And right now that isn't going to happen because he isn't in love with me.
Yeah, I have heard that one a lot over the last 6 or 7 months. I have also heard, "I don't even like you".
That stuff used to make me angry, but now I am reading it all as some scripted behavior, and I don't think it has anything to do with me.
Don't get me wrong. I am no angel or saint, and I have made mistakes just like everybody else, and there was a time I used to wish I could go back and fix things somehow, but that is just trying to control a situation that is not within my control. Heck, nobody even bothered to ask or warn me, so after going through a range of emotions, I am starting to settle in on "nothing I did was unforgivable, and I would have worked to save our marriage if I even had a clue it was even nearing this kind of trouble" and "I don't deserve to be treated badly".
I don't know if I am giving up or not, but I certainly know that there is nothing I can do about it at this point except take care of myself, my dogs, this house, and hang onto my job. In a normal life with a good marriage that's a load in itself, and it's a lot to take care of as a single (which is looking inevitable).
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
