Recently we bought a puppy, which is lovely. The downside is that it sleeps in our room and my H said he did not want to have sex with it "watching". He said don't worry it will only live about 10 to 15 years!!!
I did talk to him about this, but sort of joking (I think he was joking too). I am working on the talking about it business. I think I am getting better. One thing that sometimes puts me off is chosing the right word for something. For example I would think should I say "having sex" or "making love"? and this could put me off saying anything. So now I just try to say whatever comes into my head as long as it is expressed in a loving way. I still have some probs with it. It would be easier if my H were more relaxed about it but he seems very unreceptive sometimes, an annoying habit he has is that he seems to take things the wrong way on purpose when he is not interested in a conversation. I know he does this sometimes and it is OK if it is not such an emotive subject, but I sort of dread him doing this when I am trying to talk about sex.
I asked H if he would watch this sex guide type video with me and he said perhaps. I told him I was going to order one. When I get it I will ask him again more nicely and tell him it is important to me. I think it is hard to get this across somehow. He thinks of it as pornography I think whereas I want to watch it more as something that might improve our sexlife and thus our R. I am still not sure he sees the importance of sex in a marriage. Still easy come easy go. We shall see what he does when I order it using the joint credit card.
I still feel a little bitter that I am putting in all this effort and he is barely there. I know it's me who wants these changes but I suppose I want him to want me of his own free will.
