Yes, I will tell you the best piece of advice you will ever receive. You won't take it, but a couple of years down the road I want you to remember back and say, "I should have done what that woman on the DB board told me".
You are single. You are free and not legally tied to this girl. She will make your life a living hell on earth if you do not get as far away from her....and stay away from her as you can. Listen sweetie, I have seen this happen so many times and girls like this never change. Is that how you want to spend the rest of your life? You owe her nothing, but if you spend a single night with her, she is going to tell you that she's pregnant...and then you've had it!
Please do yourself a favor and realize how many women are out there and do not take on this girl.
Yes, I will tell you the best piece of advice you will ever receive. You won't take it, but a couple of years down the road I want you to remember back and say, "I should have done what that woman on the DB board told me".
You are single. You are free and not legally tied to this girl. She will make your life a living hell on earth if you do not get as far away from her....and stay away from her as you can. Listen sweetie, I have seen this happen so many times and girls like this never change. Is that how you want to spend the rest of your life? You owe her nothing, but if you spend a single night with her, she is going to tell you that she's pregnant...and then you've had it!
Please do yourself a favor and realize how many women are out there and do not take on this girl.
BRAVO. SANDI.
Here, Here!
Run away. Fast! Nothing will come of this relationship. If my S/D were you I would advise them to rethink their priorities. You still don't have kids. Keep it that way. Think about what kind of home they would grow up in if you stay in this R.
So I thought after our last conversation I wouldn't hear from her again. I was going back and forth with being done with her and all her disrespectful behavior and then feeling bad for my part in the breakdown in the relationship.
So Friday night, just after midnight, she sends me some random text messages. Nothing of any importance. I ignored them. Saturday night she's texting again telling me to enjoy the fights (UFC was on PPV). I replied back and said, "I asked you not to contact me anymore. Please respect my wishes." She replied and said, "I have asked you for lots of stuff too."
I replied, "I have no interest in arguing with you, it seems that our relationship is over so there is no reason for further contact."
She babbled on via text and basically argued about never arguing with me. She also seemed to want to argue whether I had the right to ask her not to contact me.
I do pretty well until she contact me. I suck at creating boundaries.
you're doing ok, no contact worked, you stopped contacting her, created space between you, stopped pursuing her and rejected her enough for her to continue pursuing you, this is where you want to be, we only pursue things of value, let her chase you and don't get caught.
I would continue to tell her things that she told you when she rejected you, example: "I thought you said you didn't love me anymore, didn't something miraculously change recently?"
"Didn't you say you hated me and didn't want to talk to me again, why are you texting me?"
Use the things she said previously when she was rejecting you, tell her you agree with her, she was right, things won't work out between the 2 of you, you guys are too different and she argues too much, she's addicted to drama and you don't want to be with a girl that makes a relationship so much work.
you're doing ok, no contact worked, you stopped contacting her, created space between you, stopped pursuing her and rejected her enough for her to continue pursuing you, this is where you want to be, we only pursue things of value, let her chase you and don't get caught.
I would continue to tell her things that she told you when she rejected you, example: "I thought you said you didn't love me anymore, didn't something miraculously change recently?"
"Didn't you say you hated me and didn't want to talk to me again, why are you texting me?"
Use the things she said previously when she was rejecting you, tell her you agree with her, she was right, things won't work out between the 2 of you, you guys are too different and she argues too much, she's addicted to drama and you don't want to be with a girl that makes a relationship so much work.
Thanks robx!
I still have no idea whether I have any interest in having a relationship with her ever again. But if I decide to, how do I create boundaries?
More importantly, what do you do when the WAS asks to come home? Obviously just letting them come home is not the answer. If there is no consequence for the action what stops it from continuing or happening again...
Got more random texts two days ago. Basically saying I hope this is going good for you, hope you're happy....blah,blah,blah. Seems like she's trying to draw me into an argument. I didn't reply.
Still not sure how I feel. I am doing well at detaching though.
