So what you are saying is that the EA won't just go away. It won't just fizzle. It's an addiction. And that he is lying to me all the time. No wonder why I feel crazy.
The seriousness of my situation is occurring to me.
After a complete personality change, acting lessons and a courage transplant. It seems like I have to leave him, go dark and let him know what he will lose.
You don't necessarily have to leave him, Z.
You do, however, have to be WILLING to, if that's what it takes in order to protect your own emotional health.
To use a military analogy, it's not the use of force that keeps nations safe. It's the "credible threat" of a use of force that does. The other guy just has to believe you would, if you had to in order to protect yourself.
Until you lose the fear . . . until the fear of staying in this painful place becomes equal to or greater than the fear of risking losing him . . . you'll remain stuck.
