Right now, you H sees the same old Goodfight. EVERY time you have any contact with him, you are the woman he is running from.
Why?
Because you haven’t shown him anything different.
Cat,
It was about the first 8 months of so that I was begging and pleading and trying to convince H that he was depressed and just needed his meds. So I feel I have shown him by not doing that anymore and not contacting him. How do I show him someone different if he isn't around now? The only time he would contact me is if I would contact him first. When I asked about the pool a few months ago he was very nice about the whole thing. He waited around 2 weeks to get back to me and told me he would have time to do it that night.
Last year like I said I had someone help me thinking I was showing H I didn't need him, well that didn't work. He didn't show any interest that I was doing ok with the pool, house, etc on my own. So I thought Fixer's advice would be the right thing to do. I haven't done anything yet. But it did seem whenever I had a question regarding the house or something H acted happy that I was asking how to do things and that it made him feel good about himself. He had very low self esteem the whole time we were together and I thought that it would give him some self esteem back.
So this is how I get confused by all of this. I thought I was acting different and have shown him things (changes in me). By not begging, pleading, calling and arguing etc. But then again how do you show a person anything at all if they aren't around to see changes?
Maybe I should just get off of this site, I'm also on Rejoice Marriage Ministries and I'm standing for my marriage and we all know that only God can make miracles happen. You are suppose to show your S unconditional love. I don't want another R down the road or anything, I want to obey my vows and fight for my M with the help of God.
I was thinking yesterday about getting off of this site because I guess I just can't be as strong as a lot of you are and especially your friend, your hero. I admire everyone that has given me advice and those that have moved on or reconciled. I don't want to be a bother and it seems like some of you are getting disgusted with me because of my confusion and asking the same questions, and I fully understand. I'm sorry for what I have put you through, but want to thank you for everything you have done for me.
