Hi, I thankyou for all your replies, special thanks to Heartsblessing for taking the time to reply at length and give me insight into what she sees, unfortunately though Heartsblessing you must of missed the info that I posted some time ago that said ex actually married the ow, he had been left less than a year when that marriage took place, they have been together 5 years now and married 4 years in november. also to those of you who thought you were hijacking my thread no worries about that you are most welcome, regards everyone
oh and just to add it was my birthday yesterday and ex didnt take son shopping for cards and presents as he did for mothers day, so maybe that was a sprat to catch a mackerel, never mind x
So sorry to have missed the info that he did, indeed marry OW. I kept THINKING he might have, but I'm also human, not divine..and therefore do not "see" everything.
I do think he's seeing the damage he's done, but since he's married OW, it's TOO LATE now to really "fix" anything except maybe his relationship with his son. I'm guessing he's also seeing the haste in which he acted...I would not want to be in his shoes.
It will be most interesting to see what happens next.
Regarding the "children" within, EVERY person contains them..we are comprised of bits and pieces within our psyche..although we eventually grow up in body, our emotional growth occurs throughout our life, and childhood wounds that need healing are a more common occurrence than people realize...mostly showing up during the Midlife transition that can turn into a crisis.
OP found an interesting link that he's posted, and it's an interesting read, backing up what I'd seen in my husband.
I, too, remember the childlike feelings that surfaced during my transition..and remember at least ONE child clearly that actually talked to my husband before disappearing/settling within.
It sounds crazy, but it's true.
Remember, as each person is different, every MLC/Transition is different..what works for one may not work for another. Most of the time it is trial and error for ALL involved.
The path of the MLCer is very interesting. Especially the the children. In my H I have seen 9, 13 and 18 year old.
Can anyone give me insight into the awakening mentioned by HB as I just wondered at what stage this was seen and what signs are given by the MLCer that this is occuring?
well the crap is about to hit the fan again so to speak. son as said all along that he doesnt want exs wifey to go to his rugby come what may, son says that is his and dads sport and on the odd occasion ex cant get there I attend myself. well to get around that ex and wifey have decided that this weekend they will attend sons match along with her parents, watch the game and then go for a meal some 3 hours after. this is wifeys way or worming herself into the only space that ex has with his son without her, and from here on in she will go to all the matches, son is none too happy, I can foresee a blowout about to begin. also I told son that I will no longer be able to go to his matches if she is attending as it would be none too wise. what a woman I say, gets herself into everywhere she isnt wanted or needed, also maybe a bit of jealousy as she knows I went to the match a few weeks ago and ex was also there, she obviously still feels threatened by me and maybe thinks I want to steal her man, gooodness me shes welcome to him and all the misery they live in. x
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
BeingMe, I dont know what son will do, he tends to go along with his fathers decisions as he is afraid of saying no to his dad, he is afraid of rejection again, I have told ex this and he claims no way no how will he ever lose contact with son again. Think sometimes though that ex is pushing son in the wifeys direction it is just like he hasnt learnt anything over the last five years, I am presuming son will either fly off the handle and that will be the end of their relationship again, or he will let it ride and stew on it, but then aftertime it surfaces and he goes into a rage at home. Either way I can see son and father relationship not lasting much longer as all his dad is doing is forcing son to do absolutely everthing with wifey in tow, son says he loves his dad and wants to see him, but not her not now not ever. I dunno, I think that if son doesnt get any alone time with dad then that will be it son will stop bothering, ex cannot see that and maybe doesnt want to, if he loses son again that will be final, we will see what happens x
I sence while they are children, they are willing to put up with anyuthing to get/ keep R with walk away parent my guess is when they grow up many of these children will want nothing to do with or very little to do with this parent It is sad that the MLCer puts OP in front of his children prayers with you peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
