I just received IM from W. She is talking to me today as she always has. I am so lost. I do not want to feel anything anymore. I have dealt with so much personally in my whole life. Now that, through the shock of the loss of the last person who I really and truly love, I have a life and want to start living it is all in shambles. I now want to go back to not feeling anymore. I need a vacation from life!!! I find reason to go through my son, but that only takes me so far.
