I pushed my H for an answer on whether or not he wanted to 'work' on us or not.....he moved to our cabin up north and said he was done and wanted a D!!
I still kept thinking maybe he REALLY didn't understand what I meant...maybe I should call and explain, yet again...do NOT do this....I did this and the results were terrible...it reinforced to him that he DID WANT to get a divorce.
That was in Feb....I went completly 'dark'...fully detached....and GAL'd, GAL'd, GAL'd...it was the HARDEST thing I have EVER done.
Every time I felt the 'need' to contact him, I reminded myself... "THIS IS HIS CHOICE!!" ...he will NOT listen to me.
With the help of that and reading here over and over and over again..... NO R TALK, GAL and DETACH.... I reached a point of being busy enough that one hour, two hours, then three hours went by without me obsessing about what H was thinking!
My H is still up north, BUT, now HE is calling ME and asking me to come up there. I still do not call him unless I 'miss' his call!
Again, everyone's sitch is different, but the common denominator here is......NO R TALK, GALing , and DETACH.....and it WILL be one of the hardest things you will ever have to do.
Remember, Pass, everyone is trying to support you, even though sometimes it feels like we're using 2x4's.
You take care of you....and everything else WILL get better! (((((pass)))) ....gg
M55 H55 my D31 H D30 1st met her when she was 25 M 22yrs...2nd for me, 1st for H OW 2005 mother of H daughter, came back to introduce D 1bomb 6/05 2bomb 7/08 3bomb 2/10 moved up north
