Hi All,

I started posting back in June of 07 so I am coming up on 3 years of this stuff. I can't remember how to link an old thread but my original post is under hurtinginside. That sounded kind of gay smile after some time had passed so I changed to Matt-14.

Not much has changed over the years except for the way I deal with things. I have accepted that things may not work out which is okay. It's not what I want but.... I did move out this past March because she was miserable and I didn't want to be the cause of that anymore. I love my wife and accept that I have a part to play in the downfall of our marriage.

I don't think there was ever an OM. I know in the beginning she had an EA over a guy she used to like in high school. Her 20 year reunion was coming up and I guess thats why she started to think of him. He was married and it didn't go anywhere and maybe more recently another EA with someone at work. I think there was an attraction but he is married and she told me he is not going to leave his wife and she is not getting involved in that.

We are nice to each other and still do things together with the kids. I think she feels much guilt for what she has done to me and the kids but she was not happy and still isn't.

She didn't have a great child hood - alcoholic father (still is) and a mother that I think sort of just stood by. They both argue constantly and have since I met them. Her brother (a year younger than her) died when he was 19 from Leukemia. This was probably two years after we met. And...to top it off she has Rheumatoid arthritis. Because of it she was prescribed pain pills which became an addiction. She is in a controlled program with a counselor now to get off of the pills which is good. I think our problems started about the time she stopped taking the pain medicine. Maybe they were there before and I just didn't notice. She has told me she was not happy for a long time and the medicine just covered everything up.

I was devastated at first but have accepted the situation and feel bad for her.

I guess that sums things up. I wanted to ask HeartsBlessing another question but did not want to do it on someone elses thread so I decided to start my own.