Yes, some things were said on my part that I would take back. From I hate you to I love you ... not sure which one was worse in this situation.
And then a calm, rational discussion about visitation, my apartment, what I wanted from the house in order to furnish it (which is basically one item: the leather chair she had bought me for my office). Me again. Attached to the good things in our marriage--her efforts to find the perfect chair for my office. A dumb chair--but cozy!
Although she says she's moved on and feels no more resentment toward me, the past still got brought up and she bristles at the same topics. I brought up LS, but it just ended up with "I just don't want to be married ... I don't want a relationship ... I'll never get married again. I'm happy again."
But the papers are served now. The apartment has been selected and I'm working on finding my furniture. My Dad brought me over a toaster he found at an estate sale.
It's been a very painful day and a half. But I move on, learning to let God be God.
