I am what some might refer to as "fighting mad" right now.

This week is an important week for several reasons at my work. One, we have a week-long event by which the state judges us and the federal government provides funding. Naturally, H should text me something to throw me completely off-kilter. Two, I'm receiving an award at my organization's board meeting tonight. There's a reception prior to it for spouses and family. My best friend is coming to be my date since my spouse will not come.

This morning, H texts with this: "FYI I have to go over to the house today and get my [liquor store job] shirts and some other clothes so don't freak out if it looks like someones been in the house"

I responded, "When will you go?"

He wrote back, "I just pulled in why?"

I said, "Just embarrassed at the way things look. Please don't use the computer." [Sorted laundry was on the floor. DB site up on the computer!]

He said, "Lol I'm not gonna use the computer, and u were never embarrassed before it looks fine"

I replied, "Maybe I never was embarrassed before, but I am now. I'm in a state of flux there. Didn't want you to see it out of order."

He said, "It's fine I have blinders on :)"

Later, I wrote, "Did you get things other than shirts?"

He responded, "All the clothes from my closet"

I asked, "Did you purposely wait until I wasn't at home?"

He said, "It's just how it worked out but Mondays are my day off so I will probably come get stuff on some Mondays"

I fumed about this for a little while, and then I told him that I would like to talk to him in person this afternoon. He waffled about errands he needed to run, but I would not let him off the hook so easily. I told him I would prefer to voice some concerns in person, and he agreed that we could do this after my event tonight.

I plan to tell him that he violated my trust today. Early in the separation, I shared some fears with him. I shared that I was afraid that one day he'd show up here unannounced with family members and say he came to get his things. Another fear was that I would come home one day from being out (at work, somewhere else) and find that he had been here and taken some of these things. He empathized and told me he understood. He said he would respect this.

Not so, evidently. I am extremely upset and unhappy that he did this.

Though my father has said since January that I should change the locks, I have laughed it off. Now I am seriously considering it. I'll process it for a few days so that I don't make a hasty decision, but I feel very betrayed. Again.