I am acting on the suggestion of a very good friend that it is time for me to change my DB name.
Yes, my world was rocked.
I went from a state of contentment and unshakable belief that I had a bulletproof M, to that world crumbling around me in pieces and months of shock, trauma, pain and heartbreak I never knew possible.
There were dark days I didn't think I would make it through.
Due to my beliefs and my children, I would have never ended my life. But I had days when I just asked God to please take me.
This community, and a few other key resources in my life, pulled me through.
My world was rocked. But I am taking back control of my own world.
I don't need to let anyone or anything bring me that low ever again.
I am in control.
I have found out through this that I am amazingly strong!
I found an inner strength and resolve deep within myself I didn't know was there.
I have struggled with my faith, and still do, but in the end have realized it is still my foundation, and the source of my strength.
I am in a process, but it is MY process, and I am in charge of it.
I don't know for sure yet if my M will survive. This is harder than I ever could have imagined.
But, what I do know, now... withoug a shadow of a doubt... is that I will bo OK no matter what. I will be more than OK.
I will thrive. I will live the life that I have needed to live for a long time. I am in charge of that.
I am willing to do the work I need to do for this M, but now know boundaries I didn't have before. And I will never let them be crossed again. Ever.
So.... I am now ruledworld... my world is being ruled... not in a controling way, but just from a place of strength... by the ME who is now strong and in control.
But, you can still call me Rocked if ya want... cuz I kinda like that.
