I still plan to post about my mediation, as soon as the scab heals. But for now, can someone please tell me how to add a signature to my name. I have ages and dates that need to be included. I have searching under, "adding signature lines" to no avail.
I think to add to your signature line you first must consult with a lawyer, submit a list of all proposed changes and then set up a mediation date with Michelle and/or her representatives. It's really pretty easy...OK, I have no clue either! Actually, once you log in go to My Stuff and click on edit profile and that should give you what you need. Yeah, I figured it out!
I must say that when I originally read your post, I started to cry. Was this (above) a jab at me? I felt hurt, like really you were trying to make me feel stupid. Was it just my impressions, or was this for real? After all, you made intimations about mediation and lawyers, and submitting proposals and whatnot. Why? All I asked was a simple question about a signature line. Don't you believe in being gentle with each other since we are all in a hard situation? My sitch in not one that I have found to be easy, and take lightly, and maybe you shouldn't make fun of it.
poet, whatisis was making a silly joke, that's all. Sometimes a little humor goes a long way to make us realize all that's good in life is not lost. I thought it was pretty funny! Sometimes these situations mess with our head so much it's hard to read intentions.
Poet, no jab intended! Honestly, some people don't know how to change the screen name and I had to actually re-figure it out in order to pass it on to you! And yes the mediation etc was a joke which I thought empathized with your sitch and certainly was not meant to make fun of it! I was hoping to lighten your day up a bit. Sorry if I misfired, I'll try and be a bit more careful in future. Are we good now, can I have a kiss?
Whatis is one of the sweetest, funniest people on the board. He would NEVER tease or hurt you. I know that you are hurting - we have all been there too but try not to alienate people who are genuinely trying to make you feel better. If you do that to people off the bb it won't serve you well on your path to rebuilding your life. Trust me...
Mmmmwhaaaa! Yes, that's a big fat kiss. Thank you for explaining. I'm sorry if I misread. I feel better now. But I truly was hurt when I read it -- didn't really know how to interpret it as a "joke" I guess. I was still smarting from the mediation, which by the way I promised to fill you in on, so here goes:
My attorney told his atty that we weren't "going to get out of mediation without alimony," which apparently he does not want to pay. My atty. said that he should pay me alimony, especially since we've been married now almost 14 years. And, he should pay for attnys fees as well.
His attn told mine that he "REALLY wants the house," which by the way, would leave me homeless. His atty. told my atty that he could/would "buy" me out, which would be about $50K, from his retirement account. This is basically all I'd walk away with, from the marraige after 14 years.
So, essentially, $50K is all I'd have from this marriage since we have no children. He basically just wants me out of his life so he can screw around with 18-35 year-old prostitutes and "sugar babies." Yes, he's on that Web site too.
And since I'm 57, I would be not only homeless but in the poorhouse when I turn 67 because there would be no retirement income if he paid me off with it. This is the same "settlement proposal" he offered to me two years ago, to try and get me to sign, before he ever even filed.
Thats' my mediation story. Of course, now we are going to trial, and we have a "temporary support hearing" set for May 10. Please pray for me.
As for the "other" post, I will only comment once. Please don't judge me by saying I was "alienating people." I don't believe that's what I was doing. I've know What for as long as you have, and I can remember talking to him for two years now. We've always been friends. I merely was trying to defend my position of hurt, and I'm glad I finally posted it, so Whatis could explain why he said what he said. And, I'm glad he did.
If we don't talk about our hurts here, where CAN we talk about them, right?
It was not a matter of "alienation" but more of a plea for communication. If you judge me, which is what you did, you may be doing that to "people off the bb," and "it won't serve you well on your path..." either.
Please know that I'm not ammenable to negative judgement. I like you, but I have to protect myself. If someone hurts me, either inadvertantly, or through ignorance, it is my right and duty as a human being to tell them so.
If I keep my hurts inside me, I will never grow, and they will never know.
It sounds extremely stressful Poet. Aside from the monetary difficulties this imposes there is also the emotional side where you feel so violated. The person who you loved for 14 years is now treating you like an enemy! I know of a few others on this thread that are going through similar experiences and they all seem shocked at the positions their spouses are taking. It sure takes an emotional toll, doesn't it. So hang in there, keep us updated and try to pray. He'll give you the strength to get through.
50,000 doesn't sound like much but it is a lot more than many of us were left with (I was left with negative money since he cleared out our checking account without telling me and I had to pay months of back owed things)
is there something you would like to do, could tolerate doing, etc
I know I had to suck it up and get my butt in gear to pay everything back as well as having to pay for all the kids stuff (yes he was ordered to pay child suport, no he hasn't paid it...I am owed over 60,000 back support...would be nice to thave that for the boys' college for sure)
not everybody is trying to invalidate or attack you...people are just throwing out suggestions
I'm sorry if I alienated or hurt anyone's feelings. I'm sorry if I wrongly judged someone as trying to invalidate or attack me. I'm sorry if I wrongly accused anyone of making fun of my sitch. I guess I was just hurting from the mediation and didn't know how to take the joke. I'm sorry if I hurt anyone.
