One of the thing I'm really worried about with leaving him in care of the children is that he will just leave it all up to DSD15. She's worried about that also. She said if I go take care of myself she will be the one making dinners, doing the shopping and taking care of all the animals. She said Dad will just ask them to do it all and the boys won't do it and so to avoid being yelled at, she'll take on all the responsibility.
These kids have enough on their plates. Their mom just basically abandoned them to move 17 hours away down south, they have emotional issues from years of emotional and verbal (some physical) abuse, they were parentified from an early age (for those of you that don't know, that's a form of abuse where young children are asked to be the adults in a home while the parents are off being children - in their case, they had to take care of two younger children by their mom's second M while they were drinking or out running around - they were babysitting and making dinners, etc since they were 8) Many, many DSS calls before they were finally given to us to raise just 5 years ago.
I just don't know as unstable as their lives have been if I can ask them to put up with more instability on the part of their dad. And the boys, especially the youngest, want a R with their dad so badly, I feel like they are willing to accept just about anything right now to be close to him, even if it means accepting me being hurt and mistreated.
